Mom at Home or in the MarketplaceMust I Choose?

 This article was first published in French at TPSG.

Early on in my Christian life, I was taught from Titus 2 that Christian wives and mothers were not to work outside the home. I even transmitted this teaching to others. In the past several years, however, I began to study what the Scriptures have to say about this subject at greater length. In the process, I discovered that this view puts a heavy burden on women that the Bible does not intend.

 

Titus 2:1-5 says that women are "to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed." While this verse is often interpreted to mean that women are not allowed to work outside the home, I believe that a few reasons exist why we might question this reading.

Working Women in the New Testament 

First, if we consider the historical and cultural context in which Paul writes, we realize that women in the Roman Empire frequently work outside the home, especially those who are not wealthy. Furthermore, in the New Testament, we see numerous examples of such women:

 

1. Priscilla: A tentmaker along with her husband Aquila (Ac 18:2-3).
2. Phoebe: A deaconess from the church at Cenchreae, a benefactor to Paul, and the one who delivers the epistle to the Romans (Ro 16:1).
3. Junia: She is called “outstanding among the apostles,” implying that she is actively involved in spreading the gospel (Ro 16:7).
4. Mary Magdalene: One of the women who follows Jesus and who provides for him out of her own resources (Lk 8:2).
5. Joanna and Susanna: Women who provided for Jesus and the disciples out of their own resources (Lk 8:3).
6. Dorcas: She makes clothes for widows in her community (Ac 9:36-42).
7. Euodia & Syntiche: Paul calls them his "fellow workers" in the gospel, which implies that they are actively involved in spreading the gospel and building up the Church (Ph 4:3).  

The Industrial Revolution Changes Societies

We also need to consider the evolution of manual labour. For much of history, work is primarily done in the home or on the land, and men and women work together in these settings. The Industrial Revolution brings about significant changes in the way goods are produced, and it has a profound impact on the roles and perceptions of women. With the rise of factories and mechanization, work increasingly shifts outside the home and into larger-scale operations, which are largely staffed by men.

 

As a result, the idea of separate spheres emerges, which holds that women should be confined to the domestic sphere of the home. Their charge is to create a haven of peace and order for their husbands in the midst of a rapidly changing world, while men are to carry out their labour in the public sphere of work and politics.

 

Considering Socio-Economic Realities

Another factor to consider is socio-economic status. In wealthier families, women are often able to stay at home and focus on domestic responsibilities because their husbands earn sufficient income to support the family. However, for women in lower-income families, working outside the home is a necessity for financial survival. 

 

I have travelled or lived in the developing world for half my life. My observations of the economic realities for women there is that their contribution to the household income isn’t merely a luxury. It's essential to the family's survival. In fact, I know several Senegalese pastors who would not be able to serve in ministry if their wives were not the breadwinner, since few churches there can afford to pay their pastor a living wage.  

Idle Hands and the Return of Christ

Yet another element to consider is the theological backdrop of Paul’s comment in Titus 2. The early Christian community believed that Christ's return was imminent and that the end of the world was near. As a result, many quit their jobs to await being with Christ. Paul would have none of this. Instead, he writes "Si quelqu’un ne veut pas travailler, qu’il ne mange pas non plus." "If anyone is not willing to work, neither should he eat.” (2 Th 3:10). Paul’s argument in Titus 2, therefore, is not that women must not work outside the home, but rather that all believers, both men and women, are to work with their hands (1 Th 4:11), to not be idle (2 Th 3:6), and to be found labouring in the harvest at Christ’s return. 

Parallels Between Older Women and Elders

We need to consider Paul’s exhortation to women, therefore, in light of his parallel address to elders. A close reading of the pastoral epistles shows us the striking similarities between the Titus 2 list of female virtues and the 1 Timothy 3 list of qualifications for male elders.  Women are called to the care of their families and homes in Titus 2, and elders as well are to do the same according to 1 Timothy: “The overseer is to be … faithful to his wife” and “manage his own family well and see that his children obey him,” for “if anyone does not know how to manage his own family, how can he take care of God’s church?” (1 Tim. 3:2-5). Not only that, to the elder Paul gives an additional domestic responsibility: to practice hospitality, which many perceive today as a feminine call.

Men and Women as Partners in the Home

Every point I have made so far has not been to denigrate the value of the home, but to elevate it. In her book "Finding Place," Jen Pollock Michel reflects on the importance of the domestic sphere and the work of caregiving, which she sees as undervalued in contemporary culture. She argues that the work of creating a home and caring for others is a vital and meaningful task that should be respected and valued, rather than dismissed as unimportant or insignificant.

 

She emphasizes that God's design for human flourishing includes both the work of creating and maintaining a home, as well as the work of contributing to the wider society through vocation and other activities. She argues that both men and women are called to use their gifts and talents in service to others, both within and outside the home.

We are Free in Christ 

All that having been said, if a family chooses for the husband to be the breadwinner and for the wife to stay at home, that's great! In fact, I am happy for those who are able to afford to make that choice. It's an especially hard one to make when the culture denigrates it so much. I know such wives and mothers who face a great deal of opposition for being stay-at-home moms. "What do you do all day?" "It's too bad you haven't done something with your life!" I commend the families that choose this lifestyle. We can glorify God well whether we work outside the home or whether we are stay-at-home moms. The Bible does not place a burden on us one way or the other. We are free in Christ to do either. Making a home is a worthy endeavor. Let’s not to denigrate it, but rather call everyone to it. 

Implications

1. When we recognize that women as well as men have been called to serve Christ both inside and outside the home, we can better encourage our sisters to find their place in carrying out Christ's mission in the world.

1. Similarly, if we de-stigmatize the domestic sphere so that men see that they play an essential role in caring for the home, we will partner more harmoniously in families. If husbands and fathers model to their children their love and care for their wives by contributing equitably to domestics tasks, they will be showing the next generation of believers how to love and serve Christ both inside and outside the home.