Overcoming the Sorrow of Miscarriage

This article was published in its complete form at TGC Canada. It is an extract from my recently published book Elles ont vu la fidélité de Dieu: 16 femmes témoignent (They've Seen God's Faithfulness: 16 Women Testify). It's my chapter in which I share about our loss through multiple miscarriages.

Why the Lord chooses that we not see the faces of some of our children before they see the face of God, I do not know.

Barrett Craig (a lifelong friend)

My neighbour's screams echoed through the thin walls that separated our apartments. I wondered what could have provoked such a visceral cry from my normally sweet, soft-spoken friend. I didn’t have to wait long to find out. The next morning, Karine and her partner Pascal asked if they could come for coffee. “I miscarried last night. Since you’ve had two miscarriages yourself, we thought you could help us cope with our loss.”

That evening, my husband Dan and I spoke candidly of the physical symptoms I had experienced both times: intense cramping, weeks of bleeding, hormonal imbalance, and more. And we also spoke of the whirlwind of emotions we had both cycled through: sorrow, confusion, anger, jealousy, fear, and more. But most importantly of all, we shared the comfort and hope of the gospel that had carried us through the valley of the shadow of death. And as we did, the words of 2 Corinthians 1:3-4 echoed in my mind, 

Blessed is the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles so that we may be able to comfort those experiencing any trouble with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.

The Internet Fairy-Tale Meeting

Dan and I met in 2004 on a site for Christian singles. Internet dating, which today seems common enough, was a strange choice for two seminary graduates heading into cross-cultural vocational ministry. Yet the Lord’s providential hand was undeniable in bringing us together: I had committed my life to missions in Africa while on a trip to Senegal at age 18, and in the decade that followed, I hadn’t met a single man with the same calling. So, I gave online dating a chance and stumbled upon the profile of a guy who was preparing to be a missionary in Africa. As we began chatting, I discovered that not only was he heading for Africa, but specifically to Senegal. And what’s more, he was planning to serve in theological education, the very field in which I longed to use my own gifts and training...

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